Starting a 2 day fast

Today I am starting a 2 day fast. Why fast? Mostly I'm curious, and I like to try different things. I also like to know that I am in complete control of myself and my desires and cravings. I spend enough time giving in to them, so I figure two days of full restriction should be ok. I've been preparing for my fast for the past two days or so. I eliminated coffee and most refined sugar starting the night before last, eating only Kashi for breakfast with fresh fruit and having carrots and celery with California Rolls for lunch. Some peanuts as and then a salad for dinner. Also tea and water. Today I have eaten more Kashi (need fiber) and fresh fruit, and am having only fruit and vegetables for lunch. Then it starts. I am thinking about getting some psyllium supplements and doing a saltwater flush each morning, but I am a little nervous since I have to work. From what I understand, a saltwater flush will empty your bowels. Cool. I'm all for it. What good is a fast without crapping all the extra sh!t out? Last time I fasted, I went for four days, taking nothing in the way of cleansers, and I didn't crap at all. This time I want to clean the pipes out. I'll see how it goes.

nothing much

I haven't blogged in a while. I guess I've been "busy". By busy, I mean working (sitting in a cubicle presenting myself as someone who appears to be working), going to the gym, watching the Olympics, doing other assorted things, and possible being uninspired. You get the point. I've also been reading a lot lately, the last two books being Ernest Hemingway's "Garden of Eden" and "The Sun Also Rises". I could never get into his writing until recently, but now I really enjoy it. Maybe because I'm older I have more patience for his detailed style. The few books of his which I've read are different from other authors' in that there's no specific fabricated storyline; rather the character's life is the story. It allows me as the reader to immerse myself in the life which I'm reading about, which at the root is really not that much different from my own. This is different from other authors who write mysteries or dramas or develop intricate stories, all which make for good reading and entertainment, but aren't necessarily easy to relate to. Of course Hemingway sets his stories in great locations surrounding large events, so in that sense it's different, but the character struggle is believable. When I read Hemingway, it really makes me want to say f*** the world and go somewhere and live the life that I'm reading about. It also makes me want to drink.

senseless urgency

As he sat in the white patio chair, he looked towards the ground and noticed a trail of ants which seemed to be busy and moving quickly, but never really getting far. A half full beer bottle was on the table in front of him, the condensation was already dripping slowly down the sides, and the label was beginning to peel. Above the building directly across the street, he could see the last bit of sun slowly disappearing for the night. The few wispy clouds in the sky glowed pink and red, and he thought about going inside as the evening coolness began to set in. He lifted the moist bottle to his lips, taking notice of the water ring it left on the table. The beer was starting to warm, but it was still good enough to be refreshing. Setting the bottle back down, he glanced at the trail of ants again, still seemingly busy and still not getting far. Several of them were carrying little bits of dirt, heading somewhere with a look of senseless urgency. They seemed to be determined, climbing over the little rocks and each other, going where ever it was that they needed to go. He stood up and carefully stepped back, making sure not to step on them. Thirsty for another drink, he walked towards the door, and after stepping inside, he closed the door behind him, leaving the ants to their work.

American Obesity and Health

I have a little bit of a problem with the obesity epidemic in the US. I don't mean to be mean or cold hearted or insensitive to those with weight problems, but I strongly believe that those who are overweight (and want to lose weight) simply aren't trying hard enough (or maybe just do not know alternatives). Not that I don't understand the fact that there are reasons behind their weight issues. I understand that people look to food for comfort, that they eat when stressed out, or that maybe they were just never taught anything about healthy eating habits.

I also find it hard to believe the people who try to stress the fact that being overweight is ok, that you just have to love yourself and your body. Being overweight is simply unnatural and unhealthy. Look at other counties, or even the animal world. You never see grossly overweight Iraqis, Indians, or animals. I feel strongly that American diets are to blame for a large percentage of modern health problems, obesity included. In fact my problem is more with accepted American eating habits rather than obese people. Diabetes, cancer, and heart disease have all become much more prominent over the past fifty or one hundred years. With it being easier to get fast food and a 60 ounce soda, what do we expect? And now other country's health issues are changing with the introduction of Western diets. Also increasing are their obesity levels.

There's nothing wrong with not being a perfect physical specimen, but for me it just comes as a matter of pride. I feel better about myself when I am active and in shape. And look at the overweight people who are sick with themselves for looking like they do. I don't think it's just about society's expected image. It may be a factor, but deep down inside I think every person cares at least a little bit about how they look, not to fit a societal standard, but to please themselves.

When I'm at the gym and I see someone who is overweight exercising, it makes me feel good. I'm happy when people care about themselves. And I really bet that it is making them feel a hell of a lot better too. But the thing that really gets me is when I see a very heavy person who waits 2 minutes for an elevator to go to the second floor when they could have walked in 30 seconds. I rarely take elevators when there are stairs available. And if anyone deserves that elevator, it's me. And what about people who've gotten so heavy that they are considered handicapped? They get that handicapped permit and get to park right next to where they need to be. Maybe they should get a restricted permit so they have to park farthest away. They could probably really use the exercise.

Just because we have a higher standard of living and more money than most countries, why should we be getting less healthy?

Work To Live

Today I have some potentially good news. I might have an interview for a new job next week. A recruiter called me, and although he couldn't give me the name of the company, I was able to get enough information from him to figure out who it is. And I went online and read up on the company, and it seems at least as good or better as the situation I'm currently in. I'll see how that goes.

Last night I was reading the Work To Live site, and I followed the link to the Meetup.com site. I ended up signing up on meetup.com, and it turns out there are only 4 others signed up in San Diego. I've never used the site, but the premise sounds cool. Essentially you meet groups of people who have the same interests as you at coffee shops or other places like that. Who knows if I'll actually do it though.

I'm new to the Work To Live thing, but the concept sounds about right. It's all about pushing for a balance between work and life, which is grossly out of whack for most Americans. I've always been aware of the fact that the US is one of the most production obsessed countries, but until I read the site I had never known about that fact that the United States is about the worst when it comes to vacation and work laws. (In comparison to most of Europe, Australia, and even China and Japan). Although more vacation really sounds nice, the thing that I'm for is more enjoyable work environments. I don't think the fact that people have to work is what ruins them - in fact the right kind of work makes people feel good - but moreso the fact that they work in little tiny cubicles, stressed out, bosses breathing down their necks, and always seem to have more work than they can handle.

I'm wondering if it's worth my time to pursue. Maybe if I get a fun new job I won't care so much about the balance crap, because maybe I'll enjoy work.

Settle for what?

I wonder what it is that makes people so different when it comes to settling for things in life. Most of the people I work with seem to have just settled for what they've got. When it comes to changing something, they simply say, "I can't." But with me, every day that goes by I feel like there's got to be more out there. Something.

But sometimes I wonder, am I so different? I work at the same place they do. I do the same complaining they do. I do the same wishing for more free time. All the people at work seem to cling to their jobs as if the world would end without them. They take heaps of shit from their superiors, and are put into situations that would make me get up and walk away. I'm lucky that my duties pretty much just call for me to sit and work at the computer, because if I had to deal with account managers, customers, or anyone else on any sort of regular basis, I wouldn't have lasted as long as I have. And these people complain all the time, and I say to them flat out either "Why don't you get another job then?" or "I couldn't put up with what you put up with. You pretty much get screwed." I don't hide my feelings. I'm just lucky I've never been put in a situation like that where I would be forced to make the decision.

But I suppose the same questions could be put on me. Does the fact that I am looking for a new job make it better? Does the fact that I'm learning Italian so I can move to Italy in two years mean anything? Does it count that I am working towards my goals and want to live and wring more from my life make it ok now? I like to believe that it does.